I threw every Bible I owned into a dumpster and decided to embrace a gay life even more than I had done previously. For four years, I had sex with as many guys as I could and didn't care. In my mind, since God and the church didn't care about me, why should I?
Tom welcomes back YOB film aficionado Eugene to discuss a recent community favorite: Luca by Pixar! We cut right to the chase with this film: is there anything gay about it? Are either, or both, of the main characters gay? How does our sexuality influence the way we watch this film? Will there be a Luca 2? Do we want a sequel? If we get one, how open are we to exploring Luca and Alberto’s sexualities? Or would such a future plot rob anything from their friendship?
Years ago a YOB post like this initially proved to me that this site had something new and interesting to offer the world. It made me feel seen and understood like almost nothing I had read before.
Many gay or SSA folks experience a delayed or second adolescence in adulthood after keeping our sexuality secret in our first adolescence when we unconsciously adapted to the heteronormative culture around us. When we finally do find safe masculine circles, whether within YOB or elsewhere, conversational topics like sex or masturbation, or shared male experiences like nudity and cuddling hold great appeal – if not laced with some of that adolescent immaturity or a tinge (or bucketload) of obsession.
Handsome Devil is a very gay movie, but for once a gay movie not focused on sex or even romance; instead, it leans heavily on themes of vulnerability, authenticity, bullying, trauma, masculinity, and most of all, friendship. It checks all the boxes for a Side B sleeper hit.
Do you ever see some of yourself in a character from a book, movie, or TV show? Why is that important? And why is it particularly important to feel represented with our sexuality? When have we found relatable, satisfying LGBT+ characters, if ever, and when have certain characters left us with longing? Is there any hope for a compelling, mostly satisfying “Side B” gay representation in media? Join Tom, Aaron, and Ryan for a discussion Ryan’s been wanting to have for years!
If we were gonna cuddle safely in the dark, why not just cuddle safely in the light? Open the veil, so to speak? We were lying down next to each other, my head on his chest, or his head on mine, I forget. Everything was quiet. Nobody else was in the room. But it would not stay that way.
While I have had many wonderful, supportive Christians in my life, I find many more who just do not want to meet me where I am with my sexuality. Instead of being a great cloud of witnesses encouraging me onward, some act as a voice of the enemy telling me I have no place at God's table.
Living this life means recognizing that there are some hard elements to this journey – some of which may always be hard. If I can't make these things any less hard, then I need to have tools to stand up and continue forward, learning, growing, and changing, rather than get beaten down, stagnate, and cease to grow.
At its core, Luca is simply about a friendship between two boys. It was refreshing to see a deep, loving friendship between boys; so few movies really show this. In a culture obsessed with romantic relationships, this was wonderful to see. But Luca has also brought some controversy. Some have accused Luca of queerbaiting – that is, hinting at or even promising LGBT+ representation, only not to deliver for fear of the reaction.