Is masturbation sinful? What if it's done without lusting? Is masturbation "solo-sex" or "self-sex," and does it breech God's design for sexuality? What does the Bible have to say, if anything, about masturbation? Masturbation isn't an oft discussed topic in Christian circles, with many folks describing their childhood discovery of masturbation as if they had been the first ones ever to discover such a secret bodily pleasure. As a result of this secrecy, masturbation has produced a lot of shame for men and women. Regardless where you land on this issue, we want to break down this shame.
My issues with self-control go well beyond the typical desires of hunger, attraction, sleep, and so on. It goes into my struggle to pause before acting – at anything.
For years a certain topic has been on the YOBcast radar. But it would be a deep dive like no other. Finally, we're taking the time to talk about sexual fetishes. Disclaimer: this episode may not be for everyone as we list some fetishes in an effort to give context to the topic. Listen at your own discretion. Join Tom, Dean, and Matt for our long anticipated conversation on fetishes. We start with the word's definitions and fascinating linguistic origins, and we acknowledge whether we have any fetishes. We then talk about the roots of our fetishes, if they even exist, and keeping proper boundaries in talking about our fetishes along with any attached shame.
Don't get me wrong, I am completely and utterly attracted to men. I've never been attracted to a woman in my life. And yet my attraction to the same sex doesn't go quite as far as many others' do. Ultimately, I just have no desire for sex with other men even though I'm attracted to them.
We're talking about "the talk"! You know, "The Birds and the Bees" (whatever that even means). Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a trip down memory lane as we recount our memories (or lacks thereof) involving the sex talk with our parents, along with sex education at our schools. How many folks do, in fact, actually receive the sex talk as a kid? Our very scientific poll results from our secret YOBBERS group may surprise you. We also zoom out for a broader view of sex: how did our family upbringing and culture surrounding sex affect our thoughts and feelings on sex today? And what do we think of God's creating of sex?
I yearn to be held by a bigger, stronger man, to rest in his powerful arms, to lay my head on his chest. I ache for this; I dwell on this desire a lot. I suppose, given the nature of this website, my admission surprises approximately nobody. But it's hard to admit.
To many Christians, I am a burden. I have strong faith convictions, and I try to live according to those convictions. I love studying the Bible and find joy in my faith. I also give up a lot. Living the celibate life is not easy at times. But all too often the burden of this celibate gay/SSA life is only increased by the church.
We've written over 300 blogs here at YOB since 2015, and we gathered four of our site's authors to discuss our favorite ones – recorded in front of a couple dozen people, no less. That's right, it's our first-ever LIVE recorded podcast with a digital audience! We invited our Patreon supporters on Facebook to watch and participate in the discussion with comments and questions for this episode's cast: Tom, Ryan, Dean, and Matt. Each of us reads our personal favorite blog for the cast and YOBBERS to discuss. We also mention our blogs that have garnered the most views these last four years, and Tom and Matt share lots of fun-loving "big brother" moments together.
What led to your having gay sex for the first time? Can you separate the physical from the emotional in gay sex? How many times have you had gay sex, and would you consider yourself a sex addict? It's a throwback episode with three of our original YOB cofounders: Tom, Dean, and Matt. We talk with Matt about his journey and struggles with gay sex and hookups. It's a raw, courageous chronicling of his story as a pastor's kid – a story still being written to this day. We also catch up with Dean and Matt from the last year or so, including Dean's recent exploits to Canada (and questionable Canadian accent) and Matt's sarcastic sense of humor (or actual disappointment) with Tom...
I've had at least a decade to process my sexuality, why certain men "do it" for me and why others do not. I've already written about what kinds of guys I'm attracted to and my cycles of physical and emotional same-sex attraction. But am I sexually attracted to men? The answer has become so clear over the last couple years: no.